LinkedIn: Thriving Caregiver?

As I scrolled through the Linkedln account, I noted an update on status: Geriatric Specialist.

One of my colleague who has recently finished her PharmD and her specialty accreditation after 5-6 years, post her new status on Linkedin.

As I reflected my 5 years (2018 to 2023) in caregiving. I was wondering if I should also post my status as Thriving Caregiver to a person living with dementia.

However, I did not. I wonder if the headhunters will frown at my status.

Most caregivers in Singapore are not paid and do not have any SMART goal or a KPI (key Performance Indicator) attached to it. We do not measure like in the healthcare settings: Eg Nil fall in six months, nil malnutrition, nil serious behavioural psychological symptoms of dementia (BPSD), Nil hospitalization in the last 6 months.

I wonder what would happen if I do really update my status in LinkedIn:

Thriving Caregiver

Nil burnout out

Exercise regularly (Target 150minutes per week)

Nil frequent outbursts

Sleep at least 8 hours of day

Achievement for Person living with dementia

Nil fall in six months

Nil BPSD

Nil hospitalization in the last 6 months

Nil non compliance

Nil wandering or need to call police to search for her

My unmeasurable achievement I think is the effort of creating a home that is safe for my mother, my husband and my two girls to come home to.

It is a place where home cooked food is served by either my husband or myself. We would cook our children’s favourite food and also buy mother’s favourite food on special occasions. Though she is unable to tell us what she likes to eat when she is given a choice to choose, through the 5 years, we have learnt what she likes to eat and what she dislikes.

It is a place where hot soup are drunk on a rainy day.

It is a place where the family gathers every dinner time for a meal together and deep conversations take place in such times.

Through these efforts, my mother has regular dinner meal times and eats very well. Recalling when I first came back to Singapore, she was eating her meals as and when she remembers or feel hungry.

Physically, it is a safe place where things are not hoarded up to the door. It is where we spend regular time organizing the things for my mother who always misplace her things. In this way, she is less stressed over the need to spend hours looking for her lost pair of socks or masks and can leave for her day care on time.

A place where secrets are shared and a general consensus that these sharing will not leave the home. Trust is the foundation of our relationship.

A place where no masks are needed to be worn and we can be real at home.

A place where character and integrity is built.

Such a place built, I know I would not trade anything for it. And this kind of safe place will continue to need effort to maintain and keep it continually safe. Such an effort will need HEART and hard work, just like the caregiving process.

What about you? Do you think your caregiving work amounts to nothing in the eyes of the society? Let us be encourage that we choose to be thriving caregivers and we choose this vocation in this season of our lives. This season is not permanent. When this season is over, we would be able to say that we have done our best, we have run the caregiving race well and we have provided the best for our family, our persons living with chronic illness/dementia. Our self worth during our caregiving will not be based on whether any KPI is met but simply that we are doing the right thing in the right season. The time is now. Let us be thriving Caregivers.